Chaos and Sweetness, with Sass in Edible Form
Posted on Sun Sep 28th, 2025 @ 4:43pm by Commander Cressida Vale MD & Lieutenant JG Elen Rell
2,368 words; about a 12 minute read
Mission:
Prologue
Location: Mess, USS Guinevere
Elen Rell had claimed a corner table in the mess, but her tray sat empty in front of her. She had no idea what she fancied, so she had decided to wait for Cressida before braving the replicator queue. It felt like part of the ritual now anyway.
She wore her uniform jacket with the sleeves pushed up past her elbows, exposing quick, capable hands that couldn’t seem to stay still. Her hair was tied up in a crochet shawl, today in warm copper with threads of green running through it, the colours reminding her of Martian soil and spring leaves. Strands had slipped loose around her face, dark against her skin, framing sharp cheekbones and eyes that caught the light with restless curiosity.
She shifted in her seat, her knee bouncing under the table until she pressed it flat to the floor. One hand tapped out an uneven rhythm on the tabletop before moving to fuss with the edge of the shawl. Waiting was not her strong point.
The mess was full enough that voices rose and fell in a steady background hum. She scanned the room twice, quick glances, as if the second might conjure Cressida faster.
The mess hall door finally admitted her friend, who came in a bit worse for wear, hair a bit frazzled and sporting the long-sleeve shirt worn under the uniform, her jacket left behind. Cressida spotted Elen and deftly navigated the crowd to get to her.
“I’m so sorry,” she said as she pulled up to Elen’s table. “Sickbay was busy this morning! I don’t think I got to sit down even once. And right before I had to leave someone came in with a stomach bug. I didn’t have time to get a new jacket.”
"Oh, projectile or just....waterfall?" Elen asked with interest, her eyes shining almost playfully. She then shook her head, with a sheepish grin. "No, don't tell me, don't want to gross out the people listening in. You must be so knackered!"
“Not too knackered for lunch though!” Cressida exclaimed. “C’mon, let’s get in line. I’ve a hankering for shawarma today.” She pulled her friend to her feet and toward the replicators.
Elen grinned as she walked with her, her mind bouncing through options. "Shawarma? I was thinking vada pav or something...there's this place I used to go to on Mars, this little cafe...they'd have it sometimes. Got a proper craving for it. Oh! Do you ever try whatever the replicator recommends for you based on your physical?" her eyes cut to Cressida, teasingly. "Because I did once and I never tried since. Blandest, most boring thing I ever had. Do medical do that on purpose or do you think it's Operations I need to tut at?"
“As your doctor, I should chastise you for ignoring medical recommendations,” Cressida said in a mock-serious tone. “But as your friend I’ll agree that that’s bullshit. It’s actually regulated by Starfleet Medical and can’t be overridden, but except for rare occasions like after surgery or dental work I never tell patients to use it. So direct your letter to Captain Alice Rios, MD, Head of Starfleet Medical,” she said with a wink. “I’ve not had vada pav in years. Trade you a bite of mine for one of yours?”
"Of course, best thing to do is to share the food," Elen said with a wide smile, eyes narrowing. "Doctor Rios, huh? I'll crochet her a mildly offensive hat...so she knows how I feel about her recommendations. I swear, I only know...one person in the universe who eats that option. And trust me, he's not exactly the sort to request extra green chutney on the side."
Cressida held her hand to her mouth to hold in laughter. She knew precisely who she meant, but also knew it was meant kindly. As far as Cressida could tell, Elen Rell didn’t have an unkind bone in her body; her idea of a mildly offensive hat as a demonstration of her ire was telling of how she thought of people.
It was their turn at the replicator, and Cressida went first. “Chicken shawarma wrap, with lettuce, tomato, and garlic sauce, with side of potatoes, and an ice coffee preference Vale-Two.” The delicious wrap materialized along with cubed, seasoned, and fried potatoes, her creamy and sweet ice coffee, and utensils and napkin on a tray that she picked up and stepped aside with.
"Vada pav, traditional style," Elen said and then thought about it. "Oh, and idli. And maybe...let's go with a mango lassi as well. And sparkling water with a slice of lemon." She grinned as her food materialised. She looked over at Cressida before taking her tray. "And trust me on this, mango lassi is epic."
"I believe you!" Cressida said as they walked back to their table. "Mango is the best lassi. Someone once tried to give me a lemon one and let me tell you: citrus and curd do not mix." Tray down, the doctor picked up her wrap and took a big first bite, making sure to get a good amount of filling; when the first bite is just flatbread it sets the whole meal off on the wrong foot. "Oh my god this is too good. No one'll be able to stand my presence after this much garlic though, not even Alina. Hope your couch is comfy, cause I might need it," she said with a laugh.
"Hey, I even have a crochet blanket you can wrap yourself in," Elen teased and reached for her vada pav, but she cut it in half. She picked up half and took a bite, closing her eyes. "Mm...I don't remember if I ate breakfast," she admitted between bites. "I think I did. Or else I'll go back to my quarters and there's a bowl of congealed porridge waiting for me."
"Elen..." Cressida said, her tone suddenly that of a gently rebuking mother figure. "Do we need to start having all of our meals together so I know you're getting enough to eat?"
"I am eating! Promise!" Elen looked at her with wide eyes. "Just sometimes, I don't really remember if I have or not...you know how it is..." she gave a small shrug, almost playful. "I get distracted."
"Understatement of the year," Cressida said with a cheeky smirk. "And I understand. But you're my friend and I worry sometimes."
"Well, you're my friend and honestly...don't have to worry about me that much," Elen winked and reached for her lassi. She took a sip with a soft moan, sighing softly. "So, what's been going on in the last week? Come on, gossip time! What's new, what's annoying, when's the next raft of crew medicals you'll drag us all into..."
"Oh, I'll never spill about when crew medicals start," Cressida teased. "But let's see, what's new what's new..." She always had to straddle the fun of gossiping with her bestie with the fact that much of what she knew came with doctor-patient confidentiality, a trust she'd never break -- and which she knew Elen wouldn't ask her to. "I heard they're considering an auto-lock feature on holodeck doors. Did you hear why?"
Elen chuckled softly, her eyes shining. "Nope, but maybe someone finally ratted me out. I've walked into many a programme mid-run because I always forget to see if they're running," she admitted and there was a hint of embarrassment in her voice. "In my defence, it's always when they've been running over time."
“It isn’t just you,” Cressida said with a laugh. “I’ve been on both sides of it, having forgotten to lock and forgotten to check. But in the past four weeks it’s happened thirteen times, and four of them have either been romantic programs for couples or, shall we say, racier programs. The real reason holodecks were invented, as they say.”
"Oh, emptying the holodeck waste is the punishment every Ensign avoids," Elen said mock serious before she shook her head, thinking about it. "I haven't walked into the naughty stuff. Usually it's people risking their lives with safeties on, or just...woods and silence pressing too close. So...is this the sort of thing the Command team discuss? Inappropriate use of the holodeck? Oh!" she smiled as she sat straighter. "How many were pretending they were Admiral Kirk? Please tell me someone did that, it just seems like such a red department thing to do."
Cressida laughed and sighed. “For every cool person like me who specialized and took a command assignment later, there’s five people who went straight for the red uniform and I can absolutely confirm that they all re-enact famous Kirk missions. Each one, no exceptions. Every now and then you get someone who thinks they’re too good for Kirk and runs Archer or Pike instead. Next command team meeting I’ll ask Niun and Commodore McEntyre what their favourites were. They thankfully haven’t asked me to try one yet. I wouldn’t know where to begin.”
"Captain Janeway," Elen said without any hesitation before she looked at her. "What? Badarse Captain, exploring more than just new worlds but an entire new quadrant...holodeck adventure wise? Totally what I'd go for," she shrugged before she looked thoughtful. "But it's a bit weird pretending to be someone who was, or is, real...give me fictional characters any day of the week..." she winked and offered half the vada pav over. "Here, before I devour it and live in carb-regret for the rest of my shift..."
Her own shawarma at its halfway point, Cressida nodded, set it on the plate, and slid it across. “I swear though you’ll want to work alone after that much garlic. And ideally not in a Jeffries Tube, or you won’t stand your own presence.” She picked up a piece of the vada pav, which looked a lot nicer than the one she’d tried a decade earlier, and took a bite.
Her mouth exploded in a rainbow of flavours, each distinct but none clashing. Sweat immediately came to her brow and flush to her cheeks. “I love it,” she said with a cough. “It reminds me of you. Chaos and sweetness rolled into one.” She took another bite, eager to continue exploring the flavours her friend loved so much — glad that her creamy ice coffee was close at hand.
Elen grinned and reached for the shawarma, taking a defiant bite out of it. She moaned at the taste, nodding before she swallowed. "Not many in Engineering spend time close to me anyway, I run at a different warp speed..." she said in a dramatic fashion. A half truth, but it wasn't like she didn't work with her department. Just...as Acting Assistant Chief, she worked alone more often than not. "I'm not always sweet...sometimes...I'm spicy," she winked and reached for her mango lassi, sipping it. Garlicky Mango. "Okay, seriously, did you just get straight up garlic? Did the replicator give you sass in edible form?"
“That should be a codeword for how I eat it,” Cressida replied, grinning. “The one planter in our quarters that’s mine contains a few garlic plants. It takes six months to grow to a harvestable state, though I pick the greens for Alina to use as herbs more often. When it’s garlic day we take the day off and we don’t leave the kitchen until our friends come over for a garlicky feast. Next one should be in a couple of months, I’ll send you an invite when we have the date.”
"Yes!" Elen's eyes lit up and she nodded, already thinking about ways to devour garlic. Roasted, confit...there were more ways, right? She was sure of it but she couldn't think of any. Oh! Smoked! "If...you got space that is," she added quickly, realising that this was clearly something she and Alina did a lot, so there had to be a guest list. She didn't want to shoulder her way into an invite either.
“Of course there’s space for you!” Cressida said. “The only reason you missed the last one is it overlapped with when you last took leave. There’s always a seat at the table for my bestie.”
"Oh I wasn't fishing or blaming!" Elen's eyebrows shot up in semi-panic. "I totally get it and yeah, my leave days tend to be grouped together whenever we're close enough for me to visit my family...or random when things are a bit...too much and I need a day off to just..." she gestured randomly before taking another bite. She considered it as she chewed, a small smile curling. "Can I bring stuff?" she asked after she had swallowed, the garlic strong on her tongue.
“Your appetite, of course!” Cressida answered. “But yes please, maybe some good bread? Damn this is good vada pav,” she said, finishing the last bite.
Elen smiled with warmth before she sat back, finishing her lassi. "I can do bread. I mean, I can replicate bread...for the safety of the entire crew. I got such a telling off from Petty Officer Ansel for...err...well, not setting the holodeck on fire, more that...did you know that you can reach a level that the reaction you make on the holodeck can have an actual effect on the matter around it? Like...smoke...or more the smell of it...leaking out...into the corridor..." she made a face and put her glass down. "So yes, safer to just replicate it."
“So that’s what caused that smell!” Cressida said with a laugh. “We’d been wondering about that for a while! Yes, very much safer to replicate!” Once she finished her last bites, she set everything back on her tray. “Now, what’s for dessert?”
---
Commander Cressida Vale, MD
Chief Medical Officer
Lt. jg Elen Rell
Acting Assistant Chief Engineer
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